Seeking for the truth..

Seeing the truth behind something is an undertaking that requires thought and a willingness to be open to anything and everything.
We are all the same.
And I believe this, “We all come from the same place, we all end up in the same place, but were all so different in-between, but no matter what happens were all the same.
No one is better than another person, be open and ready to be shocked by a difference me and you.
But don’t let it fool you.
Everyone is special and we all add a stone to the wall of life.
The best wall is one that is positive and strong.
But this wall must be passable.
It must have an opening that anyone can pass through.
But the only people that will find the door through are the ones that are willing to be open themselves!”
There are so many views, ideas, and aspects due to extreme complexity and culturally from human beings
Everything can be linked to everything!
.

what yr did u graduated in ur high school?

2009

whats the best thing ever happen in your life so far?

formspring.me

whats the best thing ever happen in your life so far? http://formspring.me/peiching

formspring.me

whats the best thing ever happen in your life so far? http://formspring.me/peiching

do you love ur school?

thinking back the old days,maybe yes lol =D

whats the best thing ever happen in your life so far?

how many quest u get in a day?

nothing from no one :D aint that popular lar

whats the best thing ever happen in your life so far?

skul already wan reOpen! u guys cant wait to go skul ?

o.0?im not in secondary school anymore lar.aiyoyo =,=

whats the best thing ever happen in your life so far?

followed!

followed what?? o.0

whats the best thing ever happen in your life so far?

Fearless November

011110
new day,new breath,start with a new beginning of the month, NOVEMBER
i couldn't believe that 2010 has almost come to an end
FML,nothing much i achieved for this whole year
what a complete failure,barely done a thing that satisfy my own needs
yes,i am just a thrash from nowhere
im just a lifeless human being
chose what i need after all,i couldn't aim for what i want
coz what i need is only self-esteem, hell yeah im not confident to face everything
too coward to face the reality,or better to say that im trying to escape from reality

every second that past through me cause a severe pain within myself which is indescribable
only if i manage to take all the obstacle positively
somehow or rather my only mind will only think the other way round
i need a guidance,i need a perseverance and courage in my life
just a little thing i hope from YOU
a guidance to brighten the light,the light my path,my future
and yes,i could only rely on YOU

as the man's saying,'time heals everything'
but not me
im just a vulnerable human being
trying to escape from everything
as people can see it through their eyes
im not as tough as what i am now

sick,really sick,if only i can get rid of all the sick people with their sick attitude
or maybe im just being a naive human
never face the reality of how the real people with fake attitude live with their life
im trying to be nice to them
even though u help them when they are in need,they won't help u back when you are in need
people set their cruel mind against other people,
blaming others before thinking over what is right or wrong
so do others blaming other people
im just sick of how fake being a real human without a sense of morality

so november,i got you
promising myself to lead a better life somehow
and only GOD will answer my prayer

CRUSH..

currently playing in the background: there is no if~fish leong

yeah,CRUSH? i've been thinking and wondering am i in a crush with a guy.well, certainly i do and im quite emoing now for some stupid reason.if only i can step back on reality,figure all the shitty problems like college and stuff and im facing a serious problem now.right now im studying in ##### university,oh i shouldn't call it as college,its a UNIVERSITY anyway,sounds totally a big thing for me,hell yeah

And im digging my own grave as i can see now,yeah with my shitty results in SPM,ive been called out yesterday in lecture room with capacity of 200+ students.sigh!(not only my name was called out >.<)but it really strike me down recalling all that stupid thingy and scared the shit out of me,blurred that all of sudden my name had been called out without saying anything and was badly wanted and urgently! its not A GOOD news huh? >.>

straight to the point for why i had been called out was i got a C in my spm result last time and the requirement to enter a degree in MBBS,BDS and exactly PHARMACY were at least B in all science subjects plus stupid add maths.hell yeah again i grabbed 2 C'S out of all the subjects mentioned! how cool was that huh?im a GENIUS for grabbing C instead of aced for those subjects! sigh

actually the reason we've been called out was for a good news,they want to let us know that maybe if we get good results for entering the degree courses plus if WE RETAKE THE SPM EXAMINATION FOR CERTAIN SUBJECTS,maybe we're accepted for these courses. Whats more this good news actually drew a smile on everyone faces,well except me. I didn't resit the spm results and what should i do now?dilemma,dilemma,dilemma,i dont know when i get to retake the exams again,can anybody give me some info for this?(opps! i didn't tell my family about it yet!)haizzz

recently,there's a guy who has "that" feeling towards me.he even asked me whether he can "pikat" me or not.i don't know whether its for real or he was just joking??well,he's a good guy like what my roomies said to me,just that he's a lil bit "sissy" =.=...so i guess i shouldn't think too much and lets see what happens in future then:just go with the flow ;)

for the last few days,i met most of my ex-classmates on facebook,credit to facebook that we've been lost contact for 2 years since i moved back to alor setar from selangor. couldnt describe how happy i was! XD we did exchanged hand phone number and chat a little while through facebook. at least i know where they study and stuff,who coupling and so on(gossips).the weirdest thingy is that im talking to all malay boys than girls! i never used to talk to them when i was in that school seriously. and we talked alot in facebook,thats me,chatting with somebody without meeting them in real life is kinda cool. i was brave enough to talk to strangers!

there's one malay guy friend who had been called me this few days,still ME kinda shocked like okay,we are just friends and we dont call if there is something urgent or mainly if we are kinda close friend.and actually im not really comfortable with the conversation seriously,sorry to say >.> its been ages im not talking in malay and weird to talk to a guy in the phone(except my dad and bro).i just hope that the situation would not change to something worst for me >.<

p/s:i still cant forget him and miss those times :( (i know this is stupid!)

AUGUST :D

2010,the year which really changed me alot
but still a dumbass from nowhere though
counting down the days
searching the best answer for every question from my mind
and yet im still struggling for my life

and still i
enjoyed the moments hanging around with friends and family :)
enjoyed NS moments <3
enjoyed meeting random peoples all over the word that eventually become one of my besties :D
and currently try to enjoy every second in college life??

hoping for the best, living for a better tomorrow
accept every obstacles in life as a challenge !!
here i come babyy!! :P

NS NS NS !! ♥♥♥♥♥

currently playing in the background: SATU MALAYSIA


*sneeze* urghhh. My blog is friggin dusty, wondering how long that i didnt touch my bloggie.anyway, its been 2 weeks since i came back from NS. No doubt that through the NS training, i learnt alot, experience the moment that not everyone can get and NS is the place where we used to stay all together regardless of races and sex. But throughout the process, it doesnt change me or perhaps change me into a better person. I am still who i am. :)

Speaking about National Service,i used to hate it loads. But now i missed those moments. Maybe you can say that i am too stubborn when i nagged alot to go back home while in NS training and cried like a baby when i have to say goodbye to my NS peeps before i got back home. Now recalling back the moments in NS, it becomes a part of my life and nolstagic moments that hardly to forget.

Here is the fix schedule that NS trainee must obey:


~ Waking up at 5.30am weekdays

~ Gather at padang kawad before 6.30am to sing national anthem followed by NS anthem and baca ikrar

~ The tortures thingy ever "PT PAGI" which most people hate to do it. i was no exception into this( PT 10, GABBAN, SIT UP, MASUK HUTAN, KAWAD, PUMPING, etc) for an hour !

~ Having a quick BREAKFAST and thats my favourite thing to do, to fill my grumbling stomach after some heavy workout. Everthing seems yummy to me although the food wasnt taste nice!

~ Back to our own dorm to change into Class shirt(that means we have to attend classes ! It must be sounded weird that we got to attend classes too?

~ Gather at bilik rehat JL(jurulatih lelaki) to melapor at 8.30am,this is the time when our Ketua Kompeni, Penghuluwati, Penolong Ketua Penghulu and Ketua Penghulu did their duties. At the same time,it was irritating to me,to stand under the freakingly hot sun for an hour without talking or moving!

~ Sharp at 9am, we attend various classes:
- modul 1 & 2 CHARACTER BUILDING
(im in CB5)with CIKGU AS & CIKGU AM
- KELAS INTEGRASI
- KELAS KENEGARAAN(im in KN 11)
with CIKGU ZAMBRI

~ Short rest at 10.30am,we had our so called BRUNCH and back to classes at 11am

~ End of our classes and had our lunch at 12.30pm

~ Back to our own dorm as soon as we finished our LUNCH and i took a short nap after shower ZZzzz

~ At 2.30pm,either we will have to attend classes again or doing physical activities or kawad.

~ 4.30pm SNACK TIME to me,well its our tea time act.We changed into baju PT for our next activity "beriadah" and this is the time where we get to pamper ourselves with ice-cream,snacks or cold drinks available in so-called TESCO=kedai runcit!

~ 5.30pm. This it the time when i feel like an old lady sitting at the corner and lepaking with my gang as we free to do our own activies and i did nothing but waiting for the dinner at 6.30pm.

~ DINNER ! EAT EAT EAT and heading back to our own dorm for pentadbiran sendiri.

~ Gather at dewan makan at sharp 9.30pm for stupid ROLL CALL(this must be done every night as they need to count all the NS trainees and make sure that no one goes missing!)

~ SUPPER at 10.30pm

~ Reach back to my dorm about 11.15pm, having my teeth brushed and laying on the bed to sleep and there's goes the routine every weekdays except saturday and sunday.



Slowly it becomes a routine for me during NS,everything is so scheduled and i hope my life now can be more organised too :(

ROcK In My oWn wAy :P

recently,i was captivated by a genre of music called electronica...

have you heard of this?

it's totally different kind of music that i used to rock in my own way,hell yeah!

(inherited from dad's gene=music lover)

without music,my live will be absolutely dull in every sense of way..duhh

i used to listen all kind of music especially pop,rock and so-called heavy metal

again heavily influenced from my sis...opps!

but electronica is something different,

it shows the direction of different music to the future world,perhaps

including foreground listening, some forms of dancing,

and background music for other activities

when u listen to the beat,you can't just help yourself starting to follow the beat

and began to shake your head and move your body!!

nothing more when i began to listen to a electronica/pop band called "OWL CITY'

Owl City is an American synthpop project by Adam Young.

He started out making music in his parents' basement in Owatonna,Minnesota

and later developing through his MySpace profile

(that's why i have my own MySpace now)

His talent is overwhelming,bursting out even from a small garage!!

He started making his own music as a result of his insomnia..

and his talent began to receive much more attention for the songs he had uploaded

in MySpace,no doubt for this :)

i have my own Twitter just to keep updated with Owl City :P

they are just too amazing!!

these are the songs that keeps playing on my mind whenever i feel lost and insecure

(fireflies, the saltwater room, rainbow veins, vanilla twilight and so much more)

every time when the song "fireflies" aired on the radio,

i will have a big smile on my face

aren't they cool enough just to make me happy when i feel pathetic about my life

it really works on me!!

even curing my damn insomnia

(causing two dark and big circles on my eyes @.@)

stupid insomnia!! grrrrr

his songs always sing me to sleep almost every night,

carry me through the night

like a lullaby >.<

anyway,gotta stop blogging..its 2.54am

seriously,insomnia got the better of me ^sigh^

chao^^

p/s:the guy in the pic is Adam Young,adorable one^^

i'm pleaded guilty in every sense of way :(

i really need to shout out here!! everything surrounded me seems to be shattered in their own way,slowly and terrifying..i couldn't describe in the best way(my english sucks)!!

i need to shit a lot here!!i cant keep my emotions in check thinking that imma hell of useless ass here...there's one saying,let bygone be bygone..try to forget the past and move from now on and hell yeah i'm still struggling from what i've gone through so far :'(

Hell yeah...Its all F>A>K>E!!

today my life supposed to be like a blast...like every teenage gals did,hanging out with friends,watching movie and buy a great birthday present for my friend who still survive in the camp and going to visit her on the next day...but everything turned upside down...*keep my finger crossed* and wished everything happened smoothly like i hope for..but fark!! today was like the *suckest* day ever...my dear friend,u should really appreciate for what i've done for you today..

lets start with hanging out with friends>>for goddamn sake,that was frigging boring and i have to admit it.As usual,they talked about their so-called BFF who never invite them for their birthday celebration.So far,they can just know whats going on with their BFF through facebook.sigh!PITY THEM... =.=

next,one my friends exactly the same person(the pity one) mentioned about a 'friend' of mine..she said that she's hanging out with her last Tuesday if im not mistaken,gave the belated birthday present to that 'friend' of mine..oh hell! All i did was shut up! Maybe she doesn't know what my 'friend' did to her and still she thinks that they're so close..sigh! (i swear that all i can see so far is damn true about how my 'friend' backstabbing and showing 'the pity one' pic and it became the cruel jokes among my friends)..again,sigh!

okay,watch movie part>>>i've been told by them that they're watching cantanese comedy movie which i don't like to watch at all...but for their sake,i sacrifice my ten dollars as we were going to watch it together.Using your ass to think about it,like i say, watch movie with friends means that u're sitting next to each other and shared every moment of laughter while watching..hell yeah they bought the seats that separated me from them..i was like fark off you asses!!all they think was okay!!nothing wrong with that..and throughout the comedy doesn't bring any laughter to me :(

last part was the birthday present>>>they were the one who said "lets go and buy present for your friend".By the time i've finished choosing a present,all of them were standing outside the shop.what the fark! they were not gonna buy anything for her or even shared money to buy that present??for god sake,i've told them earlier and even asked them whether they wanna shared money for that birthday present..if not willing to do so but please let me know coz i did not bring enough cash to buy that present!!i feel like im a freak for that moment!!all i can do was mad at myself why im asking them for the sake of that presents?come on if we shared,it only cost them RM4 per person and plus if that birthday gal know about it,she will be very happy knowing so many of her friends actually realised bout her birthday and with that only present she will more appreciate our friendship..but it doesn't happen in reality!! all was my stupid and freakin imagination!! grrrrr... :(

Lalalala..

day:17-02-2010
time:1.59a.m

again, my thoughts overwhelmed me...sigh! seems like this is the only space that i can bullshit and throw up everything in my mind now..arghhh.i understand myself better than anyone else..im kinda introvert and hell yeah everyone knows about it..i think more than i speak and i hardly speak to people even we know each other so well.so, i decided to speak from heart,my thoughts in here and thats why i like to keep it as my secret hideaway but there's one person who beg me to let my blog be in public view.whatever the shit is i want to puke everything that made me feel awkwardly weird and be the real me,for who i am so far and im not gonna hide myself from the reality world.

THAT'S ME :)

finding myself some time to express my thoughts and feelings on my bloggie,im having difficulties as im sharing laptops with my siblings :(

so,writing in this moment where no people are using it resulting in super dark circles around my eyes @.@ plus im having insomnia since the spm is over. :(

IM GONNA START UPDATING MY BLOGGIE WHEN I FEEL THAT I WANT TO..

*B.L.I.N.D*

recently i was too indolent to do certain things that i really need to get it done somehow..thanks to my disorganized kind-of-attitude,yet finding myself to be too bored to discover the things that happen around me every single day..i was kinda blind or u can say that i'm blind enough to see the world changes in every second ^sigh^

mixture of feelings began plagued into my mind..dislike being in emo state rather than being called an emo person^yukes^ even the songs that playing on my mind are emo too.. S.O.S call PLEASE!!

here is the lyric of the song entitled*B.L.I.N.D* by lifehouse(seriously i like it so much!!)

*goddamn can't load the song

I was young but I wasn't naive
I watched helpless as he turned around to leave
And still I have the pain I have to carry
A past so deep that even you could not bury if you tried

After all this time
I never thought we'd be here
Never thought we'd be here
When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go

I would fall asleep
Only in hopes of dreaming
That everything would be like it was before
But nights like this it seems are slowly fleeting
They disappear as reality is crashing to the floor

After all this time
I never thought we'd be here
Never thought we'd be here
When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go

After all this why
Would you ever wanna leave it
Maybe you could not believe it
That my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you will ever know
A part of me died when I let you go
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go

08-01-2010

first blog to kickstart 2010...its been too long that i stop to do blogging
and right now its the perfect time to me to blog about my personal life since i really have nothing to do than do chores every single day at home...^sigh^

08-01-2010
its been a month away after sitting for the last paper in SPM and the very last time to step in to school..wondering if i ever get to go to school(wake up at 6am during schooldays,wearing my prefect uniform and carry school bag which heavy like hell)
recalling back those days was an unforgettable moments...

i have to admit that i hate to go to school,but somehow or rather it is a place where you are growing up every single day

SCHOOL
school can be fun
school can be boring
school can bring fun
yet
school can bring enemies
school can bring rules
and of course we can
break the rules
school brings work
school brings cheating
school is a place where
you can bind those memories
deep inside your heart
*gonna miss my alma mater so much!!! convent truly rox!! xoxo